How long has it been since Net Roundup #4? Twenty months? A mere flap of a gnat’s wing in the history of this glorious globe. And it’s as if I’ve never been away, because there are still grown men getting hysterically happy over a beard.
From the ridiculous to the sublime. Here’s some rare colour footage from the BFI archive. It’s London in 1927, a time & place previously only imaginable in monochrome.
Next, a life affirming tale of an old woman mending her own broken heart with ping pong balls
Odd you say? Perhaps, but not quite as strange as what happened in 1731, when King Frederick I of Sweden, in mourning for his beloved lion and wishing to see it immortalised, handed over the pelt and bones to a taxidermist who had never seen a lion:
Returning right back up to date, it’s nice to be reminded that the youth of today are capable of demonstrating true joy, even if it is for the state-sanctioned assassination of an admitted sunnufabitch
The biggest sunbitch, of course, was Hitler. None bigger, I think you’ll agree. His aversion to certain racial groups has been well documented, which makes it all the more odd that his ladyfriend – a Ms Eva Braun – should derive so much pleasure from dressing as Al Jolson:
Of course, if Hitler were alive today he would be producing the Halifax Ads, those chummily humourless destructors of the soul that can incapacitate the mind far faster than Zyklon B. Could they ever be redeemed? Apparently so:
On the opposite end of the musical spectrum lies the much maligned Michael Bolton. I often wonder what musical crimes has this man committed that he should be forever denied entry to the credibility cupboard. Is “How Am I Supposed To Live Without You?” really that bad? Well, yes, but perhaps he, too, can be redeemed by showering himself in cocaine while screaming “This whole town’s a pussy just waiting to get f*cked!”
The decision is in your hands. And so we end with a soothing image to cool our overheated 21st Century psyches, for do we not all, at some point, need to gaze upon a young Amy Whitehouse with an Owl?
Sweet dreams mein liebchen.